The fact that you buy good baked bread and mineral water with your boyfriend everyday  at the local supermarket for 20 years does not mean that you are not married even though you have not had a ceremony. You registered your property together and made pension nominations. You also watch those adulterous soap operas together that feature those confusing double-souled chicks who say "...I wasn't sure what you wanted and I thought you were upset when I told you I had no time for the vacation, so I sought comfort with the dog walker named Piquante Matrimonio but it does not mean that I have fallen out of love...!"  People may judge you as being secular since you have not had the ceremony in the church right away but was Abraham secular?  Didn't he have a supernatural encounter in the wilderness in a manner and fashion not unlike the account of Mohammed? Was Abraham married in a church?  Abraham acknowledged his union in public before friends and family.  Stay together and have your ceremony in due season but stay together.  Ceremonies are beautiful but you should also be certain that you have a real union that justifies the expense, the gifts that you will give your guests and the celebration. In the alternative, you could celebrate first and realize that you don't really have a union.  Then, you are getting a divorce after the vehicle breaks down because of your ex boyfriend's or your father's damage to the vehicle and their jealousy as it is no longer show room brand new. This is because a female player is a hustler and does not care about anything else but her club VIP red carpet profile. If the vehicle does not fit, then she has to go and find someone else to feed her need to be accepted. That is just how she is.  It's not your fault.  The ex boyfriend ad father's jealousy wins unless you have a union.    Read Luke Chapter 1.